little american brother
My brother's home...or should I say he's here, away from home. (Aggregate time stayed in the Philippines: A little over a year. And he's 19.) He's all poised to take the American nursing labor pool by storm. "I'm gonna make a lot of money there, Ate," he told me yesterday. I realized that in both real and nominal terms, he's got more money in the bank than I do, and he's a student.
Anyhoo...he's having a difficult time picking up girls here. "Pinays are such prudes!!! What kind of a dance bar is that? Everyone just stands there and stares at each other!!! I can't believe girls are so clueless about 'how 'ya doin'?" (In his best Joey Tribianni voice.)
He goes on and tells me, "I'm so hot in the States. All the girls find me exotic...they think I'm Samoan or something because I'm big." (He's six feet tall, by the way.)
"They also think that because I'm Asian, I must be really good in math...one time 30 kids copied my test answers for math, and those 30 kids failed." Sigh.
"And what's the deal here with the showers? How come you gotta scoop up the water with that tabo thing?!" Er, we're grateful for Manila Water for giving us running water 24/7.
"Wow, it's so liberating here...I can order beer without fear of deportation...." Hmm...yeah, well, my five-year old orders a whole case from the corner store. And that's in broad daylight.
"And since I came here, my boogers' been a weird dark color. Yuck." Ayan, kasi nagco-commute ka.
Ahhh...there's no place like home.
5 Comments:
Kung pumunta kaya ako sa States, maging hot din kaya ako? *sigh*
magpaitim ka...they like tanned skin there...
ah yes, in the philippines, pinays slather on biolink green papaya, swear by block and white, result to etta's whitening peroxide bleach, use jars of skin white to whiten their kilikilis, and those who can afford it go to Dr. Vicki Belo or Dr. Calayan for diamond peel or obage treatments.
in western countries, hawaiian tropic self tanning lotion is the thing, they go to tanning salons and tanning beds and sunbathe themselves to a crisp just to be tan.
talk about wanting what u dont have.
"Pinays are such prudes!!! What kind of a dance bar is that? Everyone just stands there and stares at each other!!!"
he was at eastwood, still a kid's zone. you guys shouldve gone to makati or your fave stomping ground at timog, where the people are, um, open-minded to put it mildly... ;)
"Wow, it's so liberating here...I can order beer without fear of deportation...."
ok, try deporting a 6-foot samoan off this archipelago... he3x! :P
hey ate! what the hell?!?! yeah, well its true!! they just stand there staring at each other, bobbing their heads to the loud house music that really sucks coz the dj is illiterate. i ask them if they wanna dance, its like "no its ok, im here alone, in a dance club, but i dont wanna dance, coz im lame..." aghh!! and i dont think im hot...they do..:p hehe, jk, no im not. and yes, it is liberating to buy beer, without being asked for id saying im in legal age.
why didnt u take me to where number cruncher said...sounds fun! hehe..k, im outtie..bye!
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