no-carb

A sure-fire way to lose weight: swear off carbs. No bread, no rice, no pasta, no potatoes, no nuthin'. Carbs are the enemy, according to Atkins or some other doctor from Hollywood.

I tried that for a day and I swear I almost died.

Seriously, our ancestors have been eating bread since time immemorial. Even Jesus ate bread. 99.9% of Asians eat rice. And they've been eating rice since...forever? Italians have been enjoying the delights of semolina flour mixed in egg and a little oil for centuries.

What audacity does some American doctor have to say that CARBS ARE THE ENEMY???

new grad? impress me!

LG: What would you do if we call you on a Sunday morning and you were about to hear mass with your parents, and tell you to meet with us ASAP to discuss a report that you fouled up?

Applicant: Er, ah, uhmmmm...I'd tell you to meet with me nalang on Monday?...

******

LG: What pisses you off the most?

Applicant: Stupid people. I hate talking to stupid people.

LG: It says here on your transcript that you failed Math. (Ang yabang mo!!!)

*****

LG: You graduated Economics from Ateneo. Tell me about 1997.

Applicant: Huh?

LG: Do you think we'll ever recover from 1997?

Applicant: Huh?

LG: Do you know what happened in 1997?!?!?!

Applicant: I'm sorry ma'am, no.

interviews

I've been on both sides of an interview. And I'm telling you, conducting an interview is tough, especially after a marathon that leaves you asking, What do schools teach kids nowadays???

We have a preference for kids from Ateneo and UP, and I've had my share of disappointments from fresh graduates of these very reputable schools. Once I interviewed and Econ grad from Ateneo, and he didn't know what happened in 1997!!! He has no idea what a speculator is, much less what a speculator does. Doesn't know George Soros from the expat waiting for the elevator at the lobby.

Then there was this kid from UP whose resume glowed with extra-curricular activities. You can tell she was masipag and all. Then I had the misfortune of interviewing her. She looked awful, dressed in ordinary khakis, a plain white blouse and loafers that have seen better days. NERD was an understatement. The worst part? Halitosis, dude. Her personality and oral hygiene wiped out any chances for a consulting job.

There was also this rich guy from Ateneo, whose dad was one of FPJ's campaign managers. Ang yabang pa nya. And another know-it-all with an MBA from some school in the US, who had the gall to give me a diskette when I asked for her CV. She even asked point blank if we were a fly-by-night.

More common are applicants from reputedly "sosyal" schools like DLSU. Aarrghhhh!!! I can take grammatical errors and mispronounced words, even punto, but when I ask you something in English, please do not reply in Tagalog!!! This DLSU BM grad who spent all her formative years in a Chinese school couldn't speak English NOR Chinese. She then asked if we all spoke English. I said, Yes, we all speak English here!!! Everyone in the building does!!!

check out this place

Jardin de Rosal, in Pasig, is a great place to be intimate with your SO. Really, the place isn't sleazy at all. The place is spanking new, and the rooms are "disente." If you walked into the place blindfolded, you'd think you were in an expensive condo unit. Nothing in the room shouts or even suggests sex, save for one TV channel....

We took a jacuzzi suite (naks naman!!!) and surprise, surprise, it was a two-floor, two-bathroom suite. The small living room had yellow leatherette (alright, cheesy) sofa sets and a large flat-screen TV, with, guess what??? KTV!!! See? Kung ayaw nyo mag sex, kantahan nalang kayo!!!

The bedroom and jacuzzi were in the second floor. Alright, alright, the blankets could've been a lot thicker. The bathroom was great, it was very roomy and I'm thinking of getting the same design when we get our own place. Frosted glass partitions for the toilets and shower, and, haha, massage-type showerheads in the jacuzzi.

The best part about it is the price. 750 for three hours. 950 for a 12mn-8am stay. Great food, too.

I doubt if there are any theme rooms here. Speaking of which, have you tried the Jungle Room in Anito? They've got a swing in the middle of the room as well a rope hanging from the ceiling above the bed. I figured out what the swing was for. But the rope???

I had a dream

I had a dream...LA Tenorio, the fastest and most incredible basketball player the Ateneo has ever had, was courting me. Aaaayyyyyyy!!!! I love you El-Eeeeeeeyyyyyyyy!!!!

And then that same afternoon was Ateneo's game against La Salle.

And we lost.

Masamang pangitain pala yun.